Nominations for this week are closed.
The shortlist will be appearing soonish.

This week’s winning post is the illustrious “May Contain Notts“ with the ‘wonderfully acerbic‘ post “Ten things you won’t see in Nottingham in Euro 2008“.

“People who moan about all-seater stadiums love international tournaments, because they can go to Walkabout or somesuch and relive the ‘good old days’. You have to get there at least an hour early to get a good spec. Then you get wedged in against a load of pissed-up twats, struggle to listen to what Gary Lineker has to say and are forced to listen to crap music for half an hour.“
Read more…

Our judges said…
“Wonderfully acerbic”
“I know it’s not very highbrow but I choked on my tea over the “Jizz on my tits for England” line.”

This winning post was brought to you by the head judge, Yours Truly Lyle D4D™, and the judges panel of Stray, Dandelion and previous winner RenterGirl. The post was nominated by the ever-industrious Mike.

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If you’d like to help judge Post of the Week in the future, then see here for details of how you can get involved. Go on, you know you want to.

The next Post Of The Week will be announced on Sunday evening, so get your blog-reading caps on, grab a mug of Bovril and enjoy this lot while you can.

1. Diamond Geezer: Subject: FW: Please confirm your account details
(nominated by Mike)
I would like to assure you of government’s continued commitment to the family. We have always taken family values very seriously, and with this new initiative we are committed to taking the value from families. Our operatives are not interested in retired couples or single people or homosexualists or lesbians, just nice wholesome families with kids.

2. 15 Minute Lunch: I’m sorry. Voice mailbox for….GOD….is full.
(nominated by asta)
Hi. You’ve reached the number of God. I’m everywhere right now, so unfortunately I can’t take your call. My message is very important to you, so if you would leave your name and a number where you can be reached, I will call you when when you least expect it.

3. Forksplit: In Spite Of The Hemorrhoids…
(nominated by asta)
“And he kept getting up and staggering towards them!” she continued. “Like the zombies you see in the movies! Or you know, what’s his name; Jason from those Friday the Thirteenth movies. But finally, they managed to kill him. And then they threw him into the River Neva.”

4. Hydragenic: Roots That No Storm Can Dislodge
(nominated by Mike)
I’m from Dad’s treasure trove in the garage,
all wood, wires and rust,
from Mum’s blackberry and apple crumble,
and Grandma’s old time and modern sequence.

5. I Hate The Earth: Date II: This Time It’s Serious
(nominated by Mike)
She is very pretty and seemed quite keen, provided you overlook her occasional lapses staring into the middle distance, seeming vaguely bored now and again. She was also a face-puller, grimacing frequently during emotive moments in her storytelling, leaving an indelible image of her pulsating neckveins scolded into my retinas a good half an hour after she’d stopped gurning.

6. May Contain Notts: Ten Things You Won’t See In Notts During Euro 2008
(nominated by Mike)
People who moan about all-seater stadiums love international tournaments, because they can go to Walkabout or somesuch and relive the ‘good old days’. You have to get there at least an hour early to get a good spec. Then you get wedged in against a load of pissed-up twats, struggle to listen to what Gary Lineker has to say and are forced to listen to crap music for half an hour.

7. Meg Fowler: Frenetic
(nominated by asta)
I’m tired of how quickly time is passing with so little to show for it. I’m realizing I’ve convinced myself I’m achieving something because I let myself get stressed out.

8. Move Heaven and Earth to Defend the Life of BEYOND THE IMPLODE: The Friend Catcher
(nominated by Mike)
I felt my head splitting, partly from the lack of air in the room, and partly from the godawful MOR tunes. As the Korgis’ wretched Everybody’s Got To Learn Sometime bled into some pile of equally funereal wank by The Feeling, I started to go mad.

If you have a post you want to nominate, please leave a link in the comments below.

The deadline for nominations is Friday November 23rd.

We’re also looking for some more volunteers to help with the judging. Interested? (and who wouldn’t be?) Clicky here for more details.

Armchair News: Neon Lights are Bright on Broadway

[nominated by Mike]

So I went to see Duran Duran play on Broadway on Friday night, having done a nice little article on the shows (they’re doing ten of them to promote their new album, “Red Carpet Massacre”) for work, a version of which will appear in Billboard later this week. That is the sort of sentence which, when I was 15, I’d have literally wet myself to imagine I’d be saying some 27 years later. If I could have imagined 27 years later. And there still is a 15 year old in the upper left side of my brain going “holy shit! holy fucking shit!”

Read more…

Our Judges said:

“My inner 15-year-old would have been right alongside her.”

“The kind of behind-the-scenes look into the glamourous world mirage of reporting on famous people that never makes it into magazines”

“I think you just made an aging rock star drummer’s day.”

Your shortlister this week was Patita.
The Judge-ly huddle consisted of asta, Bob and SwissToni

If you’d like to help judge Post of the Week in the future, then see here for details of how you can get involved.

Thanks. It’s been emotional.