August 4th, 2007

1. Big Noise: The Radicalization of an Ordinary Woman
(nominated by Mike Meiselman)

I asked why she was crying. She said our conversation was the first time an able-bodied person thought she had something to contribute and it was the longest conversation she had ever had outside her family.

2. Bitchy Jones’s Diary: Navigating by Landmarks
(nominated by last candle)

This is about how me and Jack had sex the day we met. Power-exchangey sex. The full thing. In public. Standing up. With clothes on. In the rain. Every kind of d/s sex with just the mouth.

3. Dave Gorman: Twisted
(nominated by diamond geezer)

“There’s nothing wrong with anything you’ve got here,” he said, handing me back my camera. “We’re just having a friendly word. That said, my advice would be that you should leave.”

4. Hymn: Window
(nominated by James)

Water is coming down in sheets; not fine Egyptian cotton ones but bobbley flannelette that’s faded and worn from over washing. Someone’s doing a hell of a lot of laundry and we’re on an endless rinse.

5. Joe. My. God.: Fake Morning View - Upper East Side
(nominated by mike)

Today is one of those gridlocked, diesel-belching, subway-stalling, short-tempered, impatient, hot, muggy, soul crushing, eau de dumpster days. Half of the city is about to ask the other half to step outside and settle this like a man. Therefore, IF, in fact, you do know what tha f**k you is lookin’ at, today is not the day to say so.

6. Not Just Hiding: /random
(nominated by An Unreliable Witness)

I put my hand over the top of my cup as the refill approaches attached to a teenaged girl in a black uniform.

“No, thank you - I’ve had enough.”

I wonder how many times she’s encountered a scene like this in the short course of her working life, and whether the voyeuristic opportunity makes up for the minimum wage.

7. Random Burblings: The Enemy Among Us
(nominated by MisssyM)

Machines become my enemy when they decide that they have a better understanding of what I want than I do. This is a slippery slope. Machines were built to be our servants, but now they are trying to control us and become our masters.

8. Scaryduck: Condensed Films: The Da Vinci Code
(nominated by kate)

A. Tatou: Luckily, my poor, dead grandfather ‘as written clues all over ze Mona Lisa and several other priceless works, before stripping naked and painting himself with his own blood. I often worried about him, the manky old bugger. LOL

9. Tooting Commuter: Mistaken Identity
(nominated by Marc Price)

Yikes, I’ve deleted her as a friend. That’ll teach me to mess with the past.

10. Woman Of Experience: Your rules, Ok?
(nominated by kate)

Ms Robinson would like it to be known she rarely has sex on the first date. Quite often, she will do so before. This has the advantage of getting that uncertainty out of the way; it prevents you wondering all through the film or dinner whether it’s going to be any good or not. Some may call it sluttish; Ms R calls it an Efficient Time Solution.

11. You Don’t Look Young For Your Age: Buddy, can you spare a dime?
(nominated by Bryant and Jessica Caplan)

When I arrived at the store, I was glowing with excitement at the thought of giving away my brand new bookmarks and building up my website audience. My spine was ramrod straight and my lips turned up in an easy smile. Within minutes though, I had become a piece of gum on the side of the street. A piece of gum with one thousand bookmarks that nobody wants.